wat bout pragnant strippers??
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
