We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
