We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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