I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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