This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize