We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
