Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
