P.S. I can't hear my feet
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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