is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
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