the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
