you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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