What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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