miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize