I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
last night I used snow as a chaser
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
