thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
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