Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
