This is not my ceiling
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Go christen that room with your naked body.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
