For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
