# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
