so that wasnt chicken after all
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
