So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
My dad just said "fuck circus"
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.