I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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