i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
