Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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