Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize