That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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