Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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