I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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