I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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