Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
