i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
