whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
