You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
