Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize