So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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