i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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