wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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