Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
