i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
