if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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