dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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