dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I wish you could order shots online.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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