You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
