I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
