Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize