i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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