Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
