I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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