So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
