I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just invented taco cereal.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I want to fling myself into the sun
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
