No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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