so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
