It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize